A Need To Change
by stOkmAi
Summary: OOC! Li Syaoran: a cheerful, bubbly and awfully clumsy descendant and heir of the Li Clan. Kinomoto Sakura: stoic yet calm Mistress of Clow cards. Sakura has changed all cards into Sakura cards, except for..the LOVE card? why? R&R! -doing MAJOR REVISIONS-
1. 1: The Clow Mistress

**A NEED TO CHANGE**

**Author: stOkmAi**

**Full summary:** Kinomoto Sakura has changed all cards into Sakura cards, except for one... the LOVE card. "How is this possible?" they ask. Apparently it can't be changed because of her lack of emotion and love... But when the happy-go-lucky heir of the Li Clan, who came to Japan to get the Clow cards from her, decided to help her, will she be able to be as cheerful as him and change the Love card, as well as her heart?

**Disclaimers:** I do not own Card Captor Sakura. Clamp does.

**A/N:** My second CCS fic! But even so, please go easy on me.

**Edit:** Hey, so I decided to edit the story. Not much has changed to be honest, but I've added a few things here and there... So, yeah. Please go easy on me (yet again) for it's been years since I last wrote. huh.

**Warnings:** OOC-ness! And lots of it from the pair!

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**CHAPTER I  
****The Clow Mistress' Challenge**

**-Tomoeda, Japan-**

"Well done, Miss Kinomoto."

It was well over midnight. The moon shone brightly in the clear night sky, making the roofs of the houses in little Tomoeda shine with her radiant glow. The people in this peaceful town slept soundly in deep slumber. Little did they know that a girl by the age of fifteen had just saved the world.

A boy, not older than sixteen, was standing in the middle of the park, wearing blue robes, a big black hat, and holding a very long staff with a sun on the tip. He had blue-black hair, and under his glasses were a pair of azure blue eyes. Although his eyes were warm and youthful-looking, it held knowledge beyond the boy's age. Beside him was a tall, pink-haired woman with butterfly wings and a black panther-like creature, also with wings plus a blue gem on his forehead.

A small smile was curved in the boy's lips. "Although it took you almost two years for capturing the Clow cards you _accidentally_ released, I still congratulate you, for you have done it all alone," he said in a soft yet firm voice.

The girl he addressed as Miss Kinomoto was a few feet before him. She had shoulder-length auburn hair, which was tied in a hairdress-pigtail style. She had emerald green eyes, not as warm as the boy's, but it seemed...expressionless, cold even. She was holding a rod shorter than the boy's, and also beside her was had a man with long silver hair and angel-like wings and a dark orange lion-like creature with wings and armor with a big red jewel on his forehead and chest.

"Actually," she said in a calm yet monotone voice, "I have had great help from you, Eriol, and Tomoyo." She pointed to the girl, also fifteen, with raven hair and amethyst eyes, as she taped the whole conversation.

The boy, Eriol, chuckled slightly. "No, actually I have done nothing but watch you and...interrupt, Sakura."

"Yes, but your interruptions, as you have kindly put it, have somewhat helped me," the girl, Sakura, said in the same monotone voice. "I guess the only real interruptions came from that Chinese girl."

Eriol gave a little smile. "True enough. Hmm. Well then, since you have captured all of my...wait, I mean, all of _Clow Reed's_ cards, I now have a challenge for you."

Tomoyo gripped her camera tighter as Sakura said, "And what may that be?"

"Name the cards as your own."

And that was the Clow Mistress' challenge: _to name the Clow cards as Sakura cards._

**-The next day, in Hong Kong China-**

"AAAAYYYIIIEEE!"

A girl in her late teens (or early twenties?) was running around the house, er, mansion, screaming like a banshee. Apparently her little brother, who was on the second floor, "accidentally" poured a bucket of ice, cold water on top of her, making the ice go under her shirt. The little brother was, well, laughing his head off.

"LI XIAO LANG!"

The boy, called Xiao Lang, was about sixteen, and he had chestnut brown hair and laughing amber eyes. He flinched at the VERY angry tone of voice his mother used. Yet it did not scare him. Nope, this was just one of the _normal_ days in the Li manor.

He puffed his chest up as he walked towards his mother's study, which was at the exact opposite side from where the "accident" took place, and on the first floor (how his mother's voice got to him, no one knew). He passed by his three other sisters helping their younger sister while sniggering behind their brother. Xiao Lang rolled his eyes.

Mrs. Li Yelan slammed her hand in her desk as Xiao Lang sat down. Xiao Lang just blinked at her innocently.

"You have gone too far, Xiao Lang," his mother said angrily. "As much as I want to tolerate your actions at home, it seems that I cannot, for you are like that even OUTSIDE home. Honestly! You have gone too far. You have disgraced the name of the family. The elders have always said that you were an omen, a black sheep. And for years of not believing that, now I fully believe them."

"So?" he said in a tone that irritates the Li elders: a bubbly and cheerful one. "The elders are so _old_ and _boring_. All they have are their stupid rules and those other crap about not having emotions and stuff. It's pathetic."

"It is not pathetic! That is the way of the Li Clan!" Yelan countered. "Emotion is useless when you fight, for it will only bring to you distraction. You are a man, Xiao Lang. A LI as a matter of fact. It has always been like that. Rid of your emotions."

"And be as boring as those old geezers? Hell no!"

Yelan slammed her hand to the desk. "Enough! As I said, I will not tolerate your actions any longer! You are sixteen, it is time for you to grow up!" Xiao Lang just blinked.

Sighing, she shook her head, then said, "Look, I'm telling you all these because you have to go to Japan tomorrow."

At this, Xiao Lang's eyes lit up. "Really? A vacation?"

"No!" his mother said. "The girl who released the Clow cards has captured all. Apparently Meilin couldn't...handle her."

Xiao Lang snorted. "I always knew Meilin was weak."

"And you, Syaoran?" a voice from the door yelled, using Xiao Lang's Japanese name. They turned to the door to see a girl with her black hair tied in odangos and her fiery red eyes, fuming. She had her hands on her hips. "What do YOU do in your spare time, huh? Like a bully-"

"I was bored, okay?" Syaoran said, throwing his hands up in mock defeat. "Like there's some Clow cards loose here or something."

"That is why the elders have decided, though reluctantly, to send YOU to Japan," Yelan said, finally calm, well, as calm as she can be. "They said that maybe you would find ridding of emotions important when you have a well worthy opponent at sight."

"Ha!" he mocked. "It's a GIRL, mom. Ridding of emotions won't be necessary." Meilin rolled her eyes.

"Remember, Xiao Lang, you must get all of the Clow cards from her before she turns all the Clow cards into her own." His mother informed him.

He punched his palm. "Easy as pie."

-**TBC**-

**A/N:** ei! It's me again! So, how was it? I know its short BUT its still the first chappie! I know I changed some stuff (this is based on the anime, peepz! I only read volume 2 of the manga version –sweatdrop–) but this is a fanfic! And fanfics don't necessarily need to follow EVERY ITSY BITSY DETAIL of the real one, right?

REVIEW! (Points to the 'go' button below) I'd really love that. And if you want to flame me, just be sure you state the reason and if the reason is, well, reasonable. Don't flame if you just want to say my story sucks for no real reason at all. You'll just be wasting your time. I'd really appreciate it if you had a very good reason. Constructive criticism, if you must.


	2. 2: So We Meet

**A NEED TO CHANGE**

**Author: stOkmAi**

**Disclaimers:** I do not own Card Captor Sakura. Do I look like someone who could make a story like that?

**A/N:** Hi-low! Mah second chappie! Thanks to those who reviewed so far!

**Edit:** Again, some minor changes, mostly at the end of this chapter. Just so you know, I wrote this when I was about 14 or 15 years old. Now I'm 20. So, yeaaah. Also, please excuse my bad editing, I did this at dawn. 2 AM-ish.

**Warnings:** OOC-ness! And lots of it from the pair!

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**CHAPTER II  
So We Meet **

**-Tomoeda, Japan-**

Soft rays of sunlight lit the very peaceful Tomoeda, telling everyone that it was morning. The birds chirped happily, thanking God for this wonderful new day He has given. As the sun made its way up, two early birds could be seen walking.

It was Kinomoto Sakura with her best friend Daidouji Tomoyo. They were walking towards Tomoeda High in a slow but comfortable pace, since it was still early.

"So," Tomoyo said, with her angelic and light tone, "how are you going to change the Clow cards into Sakura cards?"

Sakura shrugged. "I've asked Kero-chan, and he said I have to say some incantation of some sort, and then its done."

"Ooh, really? And when are you going to do that? I'd love to tape it!"

Sakura thought for a while. "How about after school?"

"All right! And I know the perfect costume for it!" Typical Tomoyo.

**-Tomoeda High-**

A few people were already inside class I-A, which includes Sakura's friends, Chiharu, Rika, Naoko, and Yamazaki. All of them have been classmates since grade school. They were all around Chiharu's seat at the center of the classroom, chatting.

"Ohayou, minna-san!" Tomoyo said cheerfully as they made their way towards them.

"Ohayou, Sakura-chan, Tomoyo-chan!" their friends greeted back. Sakura simply nodded.

"Hey, I heard there's a new student," Chiharu, the gossip-girl of the group, told them excitedly. "And lo and behold! It's a boy! And a cute one at that." She winked, particularly to Sakura, but Sakura took no notice of that.

"News flies fast in this class, but what do you expect from Chiharu?" a voice said, chuckling. They all turned to see Eriol enter the room, smiling at all of them.

"Ohayou, Hiiragizawa-san," all but one chanted.

"Ohayou, minna," he greeted in reply, but smiling most of all to Tomoyo. She blushed.

"So," Chiharu said, "you also know there's a new student? How?"

"Well, let's just say I've...known him."

"Honto?" all ears were on him... well, except for Sakura's, that is.

Eriol nodded. "Uh-huh. He's from Hong Kong."

"And?" Chiharu asked eagerly. The classroom was beginning to fill up with students.

"He's...my descendant."

"Descendant?" Naoko asked quizzically.

"What's his name?" Rika asked.

"Name? It's-"

The bell rang. _Saved by the bell._ Terada-sensei, their advisor ever since forever, came in.

"Ohayou, minna-san! Please settle down!" he said. The students took their seats. Sakura sat behind Tomoyo, beside the windows.

"Okay! Today, we have a new student, so I want you to please be nice to him. Please come in."

The door slid open, revealing a teen with messy chestnut brown hair and bright amber eyes. For a new student, he doesn't seem to be nervous, and he walked inside the classroom with a big smile on his face.

"Ohayou! I am Li Xiao Lang from Hong Kong. My Japanese name is Syaoran, so I guess that's what you can call me. Nice to meet you all!" he said cheerfully.

"For a Chinese, he speaks fluent Japanese," Tomoyo whispered.

"Yes, but wait 'till you see his grade in Japanese _class_," Eriol, who was sitting beside Tomoyo, whispered back, with a hint of laughter in his voice. Tomoyo had to giggle.

"Arigato, Li-san. Okay, for your seat... Ah. You can sit over there-" he pointed to an empty seat, "-beside Kinomoto-san and behind Hiiragizawa-san." Syaoran nodded and went to his seat.

"Eriol, wazzup dude?" Syaoran whispered in a very stupid accent, slapping Eriol's back.

"Not much, my cute little descendant. How 'bout you?"

"Not much either," he replied, shrugging at what Eriol had just called him.

"Still giving your sisters one hell of a time?" Eriol grinned.

Syaoran grinned back. "Tell me about it."

Syaoran then turned to the auburn haired beauty beside him. "And who, may I ask, are you, beautiful lady?"

Sakura shrugged. "Kinomoto Sakura. Kinomoto to you."

"Oh-kay. Hmm... Nice to meet you...Cherry Blossom."

If Sakura had her original personality, she would've blushed, but since she doesn't, she merely rolled her eyes. Tomoyo, however, giggled. Syaoran heard her.

"What about you, the _other_ beautiful lady?" he asked, grinning. Tomoyo had to giggle again at his tad corny antics.

"Daidouji Tomoyo."

"And don't even think of having plans with her, Syaoran," Eriol suddenly said.

The three, er, two of them looked at him in confusion, while Sakura just listen to Terada-sensei. "Huh?"

"Never mind," he mumbled. The two missed the pink stain in his cheeks. But not Sakura. With eyes trained to be as sharp as an eagle's, she saw her favorite color tainting Eriol's cheeks. She smirked.

The day passed by like nothing special happened – or is going to happen.

**-After School-**

"Hey, Eriol, wait up!"

Eriol stopped in his tracks to let his cute little descendant catch up to him. "Man you sure walk fast," Syaoran panted, now by Eriol's side.

Ignoring his jibe, Eriol started to walk. Syaoran followed. "Can I help you with something, Syaoran?"

"Yes. Do you know who has the Clow cards?"

"My, aren't you straight to the point."

"Why beat around the bush? Sheesh. But, you know, seriously...do you?"

"Of, course, my dear descendant, she has my Clow cards after all."

"So you've been helping her collect them, haven't you?"

Eriol smiled but did not answer. Syaoran rolled his eyes.

"Jeez, Eriol, why let HER have them, huh? I thought I was the cute little descendant, why not give it to ME?"

"Because she has earned it."

They stopped walking. They were outside Syaoran's rented apartment at this point. Syaoran stared at Eriol, hard. He just didn't get it. The Clow cards were made by Clow Reed, a distant relative of the Li's. So, why were the cards in possession by another person, and a girl, at that?

"So, how did she earn it, huh? Did she steal it from you? Or bribe you, or something?"

"You cannot steal something that has been a property of yours."

"Huh? How can it be a "property of hers" when it was your -I mean- _Clow Reed_'s creation in the first place? Are you saying you gave it to her? Or she's related to you? What?"

"Never mind. It's complicated."

"Like I didn't know that."

Eriol sighed. "Now is not the time for story-telling. Look, if you want to know, go to the Penguin Park tonight."

"Where's that?"

"It's a park with a big penguin in the middle."

"Oh...kay. Fine. If you won't tell me, I'll find out myself. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm starving. Later!" And with that Syaoran ran inside the apartment.

Eriol watched Syaoran while shaking his head. But, he had to smile. Syaoran has guts.

**-Meanwhile-**

"What time shall we meet tonight, Sakura-chan?" Tomoyo asked over the phone. They were at their respective houses already. Sakura was inside her room, doing her homework while Kero was playing his usual video games.

"Hmm. Touya has a job later with Yukito, so they leave the house at around 9:30. We could go to the Penguin Park by 10."

"Okay! I'll be over at your house at around quarter to 10 to give you the new set of costumes I made for you. Oh, it'll be so perfect!"

Sakura could just imagine the stars on Tomoyo's eyes right now. "Yes, Tomoyo, thank you for that. Anyway, I have to go. I'm making dinner. Talk to you later."

"Okay, bye." They hung up.

Sakura got up and stretched. It was her turn to make dinner, and she had to make it fast. It was already 6:45 PM.

"Kero, I'm going to making dinner right now. Don't make too much noise, or else I won't bring you some."

"Okay, okay, I'm turning it off now," Kero grumbled, saving his game and switching the TV off. He then flew towards Sakura's desk. "I'll get the cards and key ready for you for tonight, to make myself useful."

"Sure."

Sakura closed her bedroom door as Kero arranged the Clow cards. She then made her way to the kitchen and proceeded to make dinner in a very fast pace. Then she heard the front door slam.

"I'm home!" Touya, Sakura's older brother, shouted. With him was his best friend, Yukito Tsukishiro. They went inside the kitchen to see Sakura cutting up some vegetables fastly. Touya looked at his sister weirdly. "What's the rush, sis?" he asked.

"I need to do something," she replied, not looking at him. Touya shrugged. _Maybe its about the cards again,_ he thought. He knew what his little sister did in her "free time".

They ate dinner quietly. At 9:30 PM Touya and Yukito left for their job. Now all Sakura did was wait until it was 10 o'clock.

**-10:00 PM-**

Sakura and Tomoyo got out of the Kinomoto house. She was wearing another one of Tomoyo's costumes made by Tomoyo herself. It was a pink silky sleeveless dress over a white turtleneck dress, open-skirt, which had two ribbons on each sleeve. She wore a matching pink hat, hand gloves with pink ribbons, white knee socks and pink flats. To make it a unique "Card Captor" costume, Tomoyo added wings on her back.

Tomoyo was again taping the whole thing, tears brimming in her eyes. "_Kawaii..._" They then made their way to Penguin Park by car; Tomoyo, being the daughter of one of the richest businesswomen in the country, has her own driver.

"Oh, yeah. Where's Kero-chan?"

"He said he has important stuff to do, which translates to he wants to finish his video game."

"Huh. And I thought he'd be here to witness one of the most important milestones in your life."

"I can manage. Besides, he said he'd catch up later."

"Oh, okay!"

When they got to Penguin Park, Sakura called out her staff. Once it was in her hands, Tomoyo asked, "How are you gonna change the cards into your own again?"

Sakura was going over the cards. _52..._ she thought._ This is gonna be longer than I thought._ "Uhm, Kero told me an incantation. Watch."

Tomoyo gripped her camcorder tightly as Sakura threw the Windy Card, the first card she captured, up in the air.

_"Card made by Clow_

_Leave your own identity and be reborn_

_And come upon a new owner_

_In the name of: SAKURA!"_

(A/N: okay, I got THAT in the Movie two)

Tomoyo's mouth was in an "O" all through out the incantation, as Sakura hit the card with her staff and the bottom of the card "broke", and as it cleared, it was now in the color pink. At the bottom of the word "Windy" was "Sakura".

"That was totally awesome!" Tomoyo exclaimed, and she would've clapped if she wasn't holding her camcorder.

"Okay, now for the next card!"

**-This went on for about thirty minutes more or less...**

_17 down, 35 more to go,_ Tomoyo thought, trying to stifle a yawn. _Ugh, this is getting boring._

_Ugh, this is getting boring, _Sakura thought as she just changed the Power Card into her own. Just then...

"Sakura-chan!"

Cerberus, in his "true" form, came flying towards his mistress. Yue, being Yukito's "true" form, couldn't be there.

"Kero-chan, so nice of you to join us."

"Yeah, yeah. Anyway, there's something I should tell you... How many have you changed, by the way?" he asked.

"17, why?"

"Uh... I think you should stop now, Sakura-chan. I forgot to tell you something important." Cerberus said sheepishly.

Sakura just stared. "And what is it that you have forgotten?"

"Changing a card drains your magical powers. Your aura is feeling a little faint, to be honest."

"Hn." _No wonder I'm out of breath... Seventeen cards, that's too much._

"But it's amazing," Cerberus said, his tone surprised, "that you're still on your feet after changing 17 cards. You really have gotten stronger this past two years. I'm really impressed!"

"Thank you. But now that you mentioned the magic-is-drained-each-time-you-change-a-card thing, I'm getting kind of dizzy." Sakura said, holding her head. _Really dizzy._

Tomoyo then closed her camcorder. "Then we should call it a night. Kero-chan, please take Sakura-chan home. Don't worry about me, I have a car waiting. Good night, Sakura-chan. Kero-chan, please take care of her."

"Okay, good night Tomoyo." Sakura climbed on Cerberus' back. But just as Cerberus was about to take flight, somebody yelled, "STOP!"

And there he was, Li Syaoran, running towards them. He was wearing his green martial arts outfit, and he was bringing a sword.

"Kinomoto Sakura, I, Li Xiao Lang, would like to challenge you to a bout wherein we have to fight to get our hands on Clow Reed's prize possession, the Clow cards." _Ugh, where did THAT come from? I sound so boring, like the elders._

Sakura smirked. "You're on."

-**TBC**-

**A/N:** ei! How are you guys? I know this is getting more boring, but please don't flame me!

**HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL! **Oh, and could you also check my other story, "Heartbreaker"? Its also a CCS fic... and its almost finished! THANKS!


	3. 3: Why?

**A NEED TO CHANGE  
****Author: stOkmAi**

**Disclaimers:** I do not own Card Captor Sakura. Do I look like someone who could make a story like that? Thank the girls of Clamp for CCS

**A/N:** Thank you for the reviews!

**Edit:** Again, a bit editing on this chapter. Whew. But making a new chapter is a whole different story. On a positive note though, I've started with chapter 4! Yay! :) I think I had a chapter 4 before but our PC got reformatted quite a few times already so I lost the original one. Hopefully this new one will be better. LOL.

**Warnings:** OOC-ness! And lots of it from the pair!

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CHAPTER III  
Why?

**-Tomoeda, Japan-**

"EEHHHHHHHH!"

Syaoran woke up late, as per usual. He quickly dressed and ate breakfast, then ran as fast as he could to school, seeing that he only has 2 whole minutes left. Luckily, his apartment is close to Tomoeda High. His chestnut hair was messier than usual, if ever, and his uniform was not buttoned properly. He ran up the stairs three at a time, then he burst inside the classroom.

"I'M SORRY I'M LATE, SENSEI!"

Everyone stared at him. Wait, scratch that. ALMOST every girl was drooling and gawking at him, while ALMOST every boy glared. One girl (or two girls and one boy?) seemed unaffected by his...showing of muscles and well-toned chest, and that certain girl was pointing at the board.

"You're off the hook this time, Li," she –Sakura, for those who didn't get that– said nonchalantly. "Terada-sensei's sick and can't make it. He just left us an activity."

Syaoran sighed in relief. And, oblivious of the looks his classmates were giving him, he went to his seat.

"Oh, and you better wear your uniform in the right way, Li," she added. "We wouldn't want to drown in our girl classmates'...er, saliva, now wouldn't we?"

He looked down to his uniform, then to his classmates. "Heh, heh, gomen." He then buttoned up his uniform, sending his classmates back to reality. Sakura smirked in spite herself.

**-Minutes Later-**

Syaoran was finished with the activity. Seeing that he has nothing else to do, he turned to his seatmate, Sakura, who was unsurprisingly finished too.

"Hey, Sakura," he said. "You okay? You seemed pretty beat last night, I'm surprised you're even awake now, much less doing school stuff."

Last night in Penguin Park, Syaoran and Sakura were supposed to duel when Cerberus stopped them, explaining the magic-is-drained-each-time-you-change-a-card thing to him. Syaoran surprisingly felt concerned and called the duel off, moving it to tonight, while making justification that it would be just like fighting an unarmed opponent if he fought her in her state and that was "so un-warrior like". As much as Sakura hated to admit it, he was right. But that doesn't mean she's not giving it her all on the real fight.

_Is he serious? I thought he was my rival, or whatever... Okay, Sakura, just go along with him, like he to you last night._ "Well. In case you haven't noticed, I like being in school. And besides, I'm kind of used to being tired and sleeping late and still waking up early in the morning." _What with 7 years of practice and all that..._

"Huh. Can't believe a cute girl like you could be the nerdy type."

Sakura suppressed the urge to roll her eyes. Tomoyo giggled.

"So... You ready for the duel, or what?"

Now she really rolled her eyes. "Pfft, obviously."

Syaoran smirked. "Hmm, aren't we proud?"

"Well, why wouldn't I? I AM ready."

"Really. Okay, but just don't go crying to daddy dearest when you get a taste of your greatest downfall."

"As if you can defeat me."

"We'll see about that. May the best man—"

"—Or woman—" Sakura cut in. Syaoran nodded.

"Or woman, win."

They shook hands, both giving the other their signature smirks.

**-After School-**

As usual, Sakura and Tomoyo were walking towards the Kinomoto residence.

"And I so have the perfect attire for tonight, Sakura!" Tomoyo gushed, her eyes sparkling like stars yet again. "You are going to look so kawaii in it! Ooh, and I have to charge my camcorder! I am so going to tape you and your fight with Syaoran! Ohohohohohohoho!"

Sakura merely rolled her eyes. She was used to Tomoyo's ramblings, but she can get pretty hyper and insane. And it scares her sometimes — even a little.

They did their usual: cook, eat, shower and wait for the time, this time with Tomoyo at Sakura's house. Touya again was in his night-part-time-job with Yukito, and Fujitaka was in a 3-day University field trip.

**-Penguin Park-**

It was 10 PM. Sakura was sitting in one of the swings and Tomoyo was taping her, while they were waiting for Syaoran. Sakura was going over the cards she has changed so far.

_Windy, Fiery, Shadow, Shield, Fly, Jump, Watery, Sleep, Time, Earthy, Change, Dash, Illusion, Sword, Flower, Wood and Power. Hn. Good enough._

She stood up, scanning the surroundings. She could feel Syaoran's green aura coming closer. _He's almost here..._

And as if on cue, he came, panting. He was wearing his martial arts outfit like yesterday, and he was bringing his big sword.

"Good, you're here," Sakura said nonchalantly. "I was beginning to think that you'd never show up, being the chicken that you are."

"Hey!" he retorted. "Who're you calling a chicken!"

"You," Tomoyo chirped in happily.

"I AM NOT A CHICKEN! Why would I challenge Sakura if I'll just RUN AWAY?"

"Okay, okay, sheesh! Don't get yourself all worked up! Man!" Sakura, breathing deeply, called out her staff. "Okay, let's just get this over with."

"Wait! We can't fight here!"

Sakura raised her eyebrow. "And why can't we?" Her staff immediately turned back into a key.

"We'll be destroying this beautiful park! Where will the children play if this just disappears? They'd be devastated if they see this in ruins! Did you know that..."

Sakura rolled her eyes. Something is _dead_ wrong with this boy. He's so... _hyper_. He's bubbly, active, bouncy and... _always smiling._ She hates people like that. Okay, not really hate, but... How can one person be _that_ happy when mankind has so many problems? When conflict and calamities and disaster happens every second of every day? Happiness... This kind of emotion, as Sakura puts it, just makes a person weak. It doesn't serve good to all. It disappears quickly. Happiness for her is... bull. And that's about it.

Tomoyo kept on taping Syaoran with pure amusement as he continued to ramble about "this ever-so beautiful park for the ever-so beautiful and happy families being destroyed". There's just something about this boy that's different from others. He's just so...happy. And it's contagious. But her smile faded as she thought about her best friend. She, Sakura, wasn't like "this" before. Well, not until her mother died when she was just 8. It was a real burden for her. Because of the sickness her mother had that she knew nothing about, she shut herself from everything. And that included being happy. Because when she thinks about happiness, all she could see are the memories of her late mother. And that won't make her happy.

"Sheesh, will you just shut up?" Sakura yelled, frustrated. This Li guy was wasting her precious time. "Where the hell do you want us to fight?"

"Oh! Right..." he smiled sheepishly. "Well, there's a deserted area in the south side of Tomoeda. We could fight there."

Sakura nodded. But, how would they get there? Li, however, was way ahead of her, as a black limo stopped in front of them.

The driver's door opened, revealing a man with grey hair and warm eyes. He bowed down to Li.

"Master Syaoran, your ride is ready."

"Thank you, Wei," Syaoran said, in a polite tone.

They went inside, and after a 15-minute drive, they arrived.

It was really a deserted area. There was nothing in it. No trees, no grass, no nothing. Only the moon and the stars served as their light. At the far end of the...land area, was a cliff, leading down towards the rough waves of the sea and pointy rocks. This was the perfect place for fighting, as Sakura would put it.

Syaoran then went to one side. "Let's get started?"

Sakura took one last look at everything, then nodded. She went opposite to Syaoran.

"Okay, here are the rules," Syaoran explained. "You can only use the cards you changed last time, so no cheating! Also, I can use magic since it would be unfair if I couldn't. The winner will be the one standing after the fight. There is no time limit; the fight ends only when the other is tired, passed out, and the like. You following me?"

Sakura rolled her eyes. "Yes, I got it. Now can we _please_ get started?"

Syaoran glared at her. "...Pfft, fine!"

They took their stances, each getting ready for the battle. Clearing their minds for a concentrated match, only their breathing could be heard. Tomoyo was holding her breath, gripping her camcorder tightly.

"HAAA-YIIIAAA!"

That single cry marked the start of the match, the start of a new journey...

Syaoran jumped, getting ready to kick. Sakura dodged, called out her staff, and then called out Fiery. Syaoran took out his sword, using its blade as a shield. He took out a paper from his pocket, said an incantation, and fire suddenly burst out of the paper. Sakura called out Jump, and dodged the attack. Syaoran took a stance, raising his sword. Sakura got the hint and called out Sword. Then clashing of swords and war cries could be heard.

Tomoyo gripped her camcorder in sheer excitement. Her eyes were lit up, and she looked like she could pee in her skirt anytime now. She heard a rustling of fabric from behind, but paid no attention to it. She had a feeling she knew who it was.

"So, it has started." Tomoyo smiled. She was right. It was Eriol. Even without turning, she could feel his azure eyes on her and his blue-black hair flowing with the wind. She blushed, sensing Eriol smile at her.

Eriol smiled at the beauty before him. Even though he knew perfectly well that he was Clow Reed's reincarnation, it can't stop him from being a teenager. It can't stop the hormones going wild every once in a while. And Eriol's hormones were at a fit just seeing the raven hair of Tomoyo.

Tomoyo nodded in reply to his statement. "They've been fighting for quite some time now. And that includes verbal quarrels."

Eriol chucked, sending shivers down her spine. _God, did he have to have a deep and manly and...sexy voice?_ Tomoyo thought, but quickly dismissed it.

"I see," he said, moving towards Tomoyo. He was now beside her. "I would love a copy of that after, Tomoyo."

"You betcha!"

Hours have passed, and yet, Syaoran and Sakura were still fighting. Syaoran was panting, and Sakura was breathing heavily. Tomoyo, tired of holding the camera, put it on top of a rock and sat down beside it. Eriol followed suit.

"Sakura's gotten stronger, hasn't she?" Tomoyo whispered.

Eriol nodded. "Yes. I can see a change in her. She's gotten wiser and more tough after fighting all those cards."

"I just hope," Tomoyo said, her voice cracking slightly, "that it doesn't harden her heart in the process."

Eriol frowned. He didn't want to see his angel (now where did THAT come from?) all sad and depressed for her best friend. Eriol shifted his gaze towards the Clow Mistress. If only she knew her effect on Tomoyo... All she cared now was the cards... the cards that Syaoran wants...

Then it struck him. What if... Syaoran helps Sakura with the cards instead? And Sakura changes her hopefully not yet cement-hard heart?

_Nah,_ he thought, sighing. _I doubt that would happen. I mean, come on! Syaoran giving up? And Sakura changing? That'll take 48 years!_

His eyes, though reluctant (since it was on Tomoyo), went back to the two teens fighting. They seemed to look good together... Eriol had to stop dreaming.

Sakura was, surprisingly for her, tired. They had been fighting for, say, five hours, including what Tomoyo called "verbal quarrels". Enough was enough. She had to end it right her, right now. For God's sake, they still have a class later!

"Dash!" she yelled, and in a blink of an eye, she was as fast as the wind. Syaoran, taken off-guard, staggered backwards and sending his sword away from him. "Jump!" She jumped very high, called out Sword, then plunged down. Tomoyo and Eriol just had to stand up.

Having no sword, Syaoran just did a somersault. He didn't notice that he was at the edge of the cliff... He only did when his feet didn't touch the ground.

"AAAAAHHHHHHH!"

Tomoyo buried her head on Eriol's shoulder. G_od,_ Eriol thought, closing his eyes. _Did it have to end this way?_

However, Eriol opened his eyes when he heard Tomoyo gasp. There, in front of him, was Sakura down on the floor by the cliff... She was holding Syaoran?

She was, as a matter of fact. Gasping heavily, she managed to pull Syaoran up. Syaoran, wide-eyed, was shocked to know that he was alive than that he was going to die. The crashing waves were the only ones disturbing the quietness that had befallen the four teens.

"S-Sakura..." Syaoran managed to speak. "Did you really have to do that?"

Sakura turned to him, giving him a strange look. "What are you talking about? You want to die, huh?"

"It's just... You could've let me." Sakura was shocked, to say the least. "I mean, I was just in your way, right? Why not finish it off so that it'll take off some nuisance in your life?"

Tomoyo and Eriol could only blink. He, as weird and creepy as it sounds, was right. Why did Sakura save him?

Tomoyo looked over to her best friend. Maybe... Maybe she was still the same old Sakura she knew and loved!

But her hopes shattered into a dozen million pieces as she saw her look.

"Don't be stupid," Sakura said coldly. "I did that because I wouldn't live with the guilt that I killed someone. Besides, I don't wouldn't want to explain to the school or your family or whatever, plus I don't want to be called a murderer." And, with a huff, she stood up and walked towards the road.

Tomoyo sighed. She had hoped against hope that her sentiments were true. But, it wasn't. _' guess only God can ever change her._

Eriol didn't want to see Tomoyo in the state she was in now. Screw the Clow cards! If only they weren't made... Then Sakura wouldn't have learned to be cold... But what can he do? He was the reincarnation for crying out loud! Now is not the time to berate his own (well, not in that sense) creation.

Syaoran was in no mood in talking, even thinking right now. Too much has happened today...yesterday and today. And he just wanted to sleep!

Sakura, however, was at the verge of breaking. She was so confused! Why did she save him? He was right! He should've died! But...something was nagging behind her brain. And only time will tell when that thing will show itself to Sakura. Right now, she just wanted to go over what had just happened. Everything was so confusing!

But maybe..._she was still the same Sakura as Tomoyo thought._

**-TBC-**

**A/N:** Oh-kay... I didn't know how to end that, but there. This was really long for me. Hehe, I'm THAT bad.

**Special thanks to:** my reviewers! **Cherrysinger, Nanie-san, iceblueyes, Bloody Priestess **(Kim, this IS you, right?) and **Thomas.** Thanks for your compliments and suggestions!

******Edit:** So. I'm done editing, I think. Editing is easy, took me about 4 hours to make some minor changes on all 3 chapters. But, it's quarter to 4 AM in my time, so I think I'll stop the editing now. I dunno if I actually made progress or whatever...**  
**


	4. Author's Note, I mean, Author's Apology

**A NEED TO CHANGE**

**Author: stOkmAi**

**Author's Note:** Hello! :) *ducks from all the rotten fruit and vegetables thrown at her* I know, I know, you thought this was an update, noh? I'm really, really, REALLY sorry! :( It's been a long, LONG time since I last wrote...anything, to be honest. Okay, maybe blogs and poems and stuff, but fanfics... Sorry. *ducks from even more rotten organic things thrown at her* But, please, let me explain.

When I first started writing this fanfiction, I was a third year high school student. That was, like, 6 years ago? Then, when I became a senior I became serious with my studies because I was about to go to college. So, yeah, after applying and whatnot, I thought I would have more time to write. I couldn't have been more wrong. You see, I took up BS in Nursing. Yep. I never thought I would be SO BUSY! But, I was. I applied in one of the best Nursing schools here in our country; I didn't know what I was in for. We had so many sleepless nights just making requirements. Also, in our third and fourth years, we had clinical duty already, 8 hours a day, 3 times a week, and the rest of the week for our major classes. Plus I joined the choir (first ever all-nursing student choir in Cebu), where I was treasurer for two straight years. And when I graduated, I proceeded to review straightaway for the local nursing board exams. I didn't even get to have driving lessons... Okay, whatever. It was a busy 4 years of college for all of us, trust me. But now I'm regretting ignoring my story (or my account for that matter) because I miss writing. SO MUCH.

So, here's what I'm gonna do. Since we just had our board exams last week (OMG), I'm kinda free now. YAY. Erm. So. I'm gonna try and at least put up more chapters for this story. This was a really unique one and I really liked my plot. **I will really try my best to continue this story.** I've disappointed you enough, it's the least I can do. AJA! :D *prays for inspiration to come quickly*


	5. 4: Remember

**A NEED TO CHANGE**

**Author: stOkmAi**

**Disclaimers:** I do not own Card Captor Sakura. Do I look like someone who could make a story like that? Thank the peeps of Clamp for CCS. LOL

**A/N:** Well. Here it is. My attempt to write another chapter for this fanfiction. I just hope it goes well... Also, to my previous readers (who prolly abandoned the story already *sob*), I did some revisions on the previous chapters, mostly on chapter 2 and 3. So, please check them out first. Thank you. :)

**Warnings:** OOC-ness! And lots of it from the pair!

* * *

**CHAPTER IV  
****Remember**

"_Yaaay!"_

_It was a beautiful day in Tomoeda, Japan. The sun was shining, the birds were chirping, the breeze was soft and cool. It was one of the rare summer days where the heat of the sun was not scorching and harmful to the skin. It was a perfect day to go to the beach._

"_Look, okaa-san! Look!"_

_Little footsteps were left behind the sand as a little girl in her little two-piece suit as she ran from the shore towards a big multi-colored umbrella. Under it was a very beautiful woman. Long, wavy purple-grey hair, white complexion, and a warm and motherly smile, Nadeshiko laughed as her young daughter ran (and tripped a few times) to her._

"_What is it, dear Sakura?" she asked when the 5-year-old got close._

"_Look what I got!" With a big, toothy grin, Sakura held out her hand to show a very pretty, marble-colored seashell. "It's a seashell! I found it all by myself!"_

"_Oh, really?" Nadeshiko said, giggling. She always loved seeing Sakura all happy and hyperactive. She, too, was once a happy and hyperactive kid, after all._

_Sakura nodded fervently. "Yep! Touya-niichan also found a seashell but mine's prettier!"_

"_HEY!" Touya exclaimed, running towards his mother and daughter. He was 5 years older than Sakura but just as hyperactive as her. "I found at least twice as much as yours!"_

"_And thinking my math is correct, you have two seashells," a man joined in, chuckling. He was tall, brown-haired and green-eyed, who also had a warm fatherly smile. It was Fujitaka, their father._

"_Oto-san!"_

"_Hi, kids, you hungry yet?" he asked as he put down the picnic basket on the blanket._

_The Kinomoto family always went to the beach at least once every summer. It has been their tradition of some sorts. And it made the children, particularly Sakura, really happy. _

_Life used to be this...simple. So carefree. So... happy._

_The scene changed. Sakura was now 8 years old. Her hair is longer, her height taller, her figure slimmer, and her smile gone. In all actuality, her face was void of emotion. She was staring blankly at the insanely clean white wall opposite her, her hands gripping the sides of the green plastic bench she was sitting on. She was staring, but not seeing. Her mind seemed to be in a whole other universe._

_Suddenly, the door to her right opened, and her father went out. For someone in his early thirties, he looked so old, worn out, and very sad. But when he saw Sakura, he immediately put on a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes._

"_She wants to see you, Saku-chan."_

"_No."_

"_Please, daughter. You haven't been inside the room since she was admitted here."_

"_Then she has to go out."_

_Fujitaka sighed, rubbing his temples. They have had the same argument ever since Nadeshiko was admitted in the Daiduoji Memorial Hospital two weeks ago. Everyday. And not once did Sakura go inside the hospital room._

"_Your mother is sick, Sakura. Please, you have to understand that."_

"_NO!" And with that, Sakura got up and ran._

"_She ran away again?" Nadeshiko asked weakly when Fujitaka went inside the room again, looking even more stressed. Nadeshiko was in a bad state. So many tubes connected to her, a nasal cannula in her nostrils, monitors left and right... Fujitaka could only nod._

_Nadeshiko smiled. "She'll come around. She's our daughter."_

"_I can't believe it," Fujitaka sighed, a small smile forming. "You're the one who's sick, and yet you're the one comforting me."_

"_Hasn't it always been like that, me comforting you?"_

_Meanwhile, Sakura leaned against the wall, out of breath from running to the other side of the building. What was wrong with her? Her own mother was sick, and she can't even be within a 5 mile radius. She was disgusted with herself._

_But... She can't lose her mother. Her best friend. Not now, not ever. She was her life, her happiness, her everything. She can't lose her..._

_Sakura didn't know how long she was standing there, staring outside the window to the hospital garden. She was so deep in thought that she didn't hear the intercom interrupt the silence of the hospital. That is, until she heard the lady in the intercom say her mother's hospital room._

"_...Room 413. Code 99, room 413. All medical interns and residents to room 413. Code 99, room 413..."_

_Suddenly a blur of white dashed passed her as medical professionals ran towards the opposite side of the building._

_Towards her mother's room._

_Panic started to build up inside Sakura. What did Code 99 mean? Why were they all running? She started running herself. If something happened to her mother... No, she shouldn't think that._

_She reached the hallway to Nadeshiko's room, but it was starting to be crowded with people in white. Beside the crowded door was Fujitaka, looking grave as ever, and 13-year-old Touya, pale and shocked._

"_What's going on?" Sakura asked feebly as she reached her father and brother._

"_It's your mom. She's..." but Fujitaka couldn't continue._

_Sakura mentally slapped herself. This was all her fault! If only she saw her mother, then maybe..._

_The three Kinomotos took a seat on the green plastic bench Sakura was in minutes ago. They didn't want to be in the way of the medical professionals as they did their thing and try to save... _Stop,_ Sakura ordered herself. She should stop thinking negative. It isn't doing her mother any good..._

_After about 30 minutes, the consulting doctor came out of the room. He didn't look sad, but he didn't look happy either. And Sakura was not liking it. At all._

"_Well, doc?" asked Fujitaka. "How is she?"_

"_Well, she's...stable." the doctor sighed. "Apparently she had an acute hemolytic reaction to the blood that was transfused. This is a clinical emergency especially with her condition. She already has a weak immune system due to leukemia and..."_

_Sakura stopped listening to the medical gibberish the doctor was talking about. She didn't care about the blood cell count and blood incompatibility and weak immune system and whatever the hell those meant. All she wanted to know if her mother is all right. So, sucking up all her energy, she went inside the room._

_It was worse than she even imagined. Two bottles of intravenous fluids hanging by her bedside, a few monitors, another tube for oxygen, and a medical intern was inserting a needle to Nadeshiko's arm._

"_What are you doing?" Sakura demanded, nearing the intern, but the nurse pulled her back._

"_No, it's okay sweetie, he's just giving your mother some medicine."_

"_By sticking a needle in her arm!"_

"_Sakura-chan..."_

_Sakura froze. It's been two weeks since she heard that voice. It sounded so...frail. So weak. But still full of love. Then, suddenly, tears started streaming down her face._

"_Okaa-san!"_

_She ran to her mother's open arms, sobbing loudly. Oh, how she missed her mother's touch, her mother's scent. She buried her face in her mother's chest, muttering incoherent words. Nadeshiko smiled._

"_It's okay, sweetie, mommy's going to be fine..."_

_They stayed like that for a few minutes, until Sakura pulled back, breathing deeply. She hasn't cried that hard in a very long time. Wiping her tears with the back of her arm, she sat down beside her mother._

"_I'm so sorry, mommy..."_

"_It's okay." Was her mother's voice always been weak? "As long as you're here now, that's all that matters."_

_The scene changed. It was a dark, rainy day, but a crowd of people were in the pouring rain, gathered around a single white coffin in the middle of the cemetery._

_It was Nadeshiko's funeral._

_Fujitaka, dressed in an all-black tux, went over the coffin and laid a single Nadeshiko flower on top of it. All around him were Nadeshiko's family the Amamiyas, the Daidoujis, Touya, and Yukito. They were all wearing black, and holding a Nadeshiko flower. They lined up to put the flower on Nadeshiko's coffin._

_Only, Sakura was nowhere to be found._

"_Where is dear Sakura?" wondered Sonomi, Nadeshiko's cousin and Tomoyo's mother. Tomoyo was just beside her mother, to distraught to tape anything. Behind them was a bodyguard holding out an umbrella for her. Tomoyo shrugged._

"_Give her time, mom. She's been through so much..."_

_Tomoyo sighed. She didn't know what to do. Just then, Touya went over to her other side and whispered, "She's in Penguin Park. She's gonna need her best friend right now..."_

_Tomoyo looked at him, then gave him one nod. Touya gave her a small smile and said, "Thanks." Then he walked away towards his father and best friend. Slowly, the crowd dispersed._

"_Mom, I have to be somewhere," Tomoyo piped up just as their car pulled out of the parking space._

_Sonomi didn't need an explanation. "We'll take you there."_

_Sakura was sitting at the bottom of the penguin slide, completely drenched with rain. Her knees to her chest, she was covering her face with her crossed arms. Tomoyo came up to her, putting her yellow umbrella over the both of them._

"_Sakura..."_

_They stayed like that for a few minutes. Suddenly, Sakura stood up and started walking._

"_Matte... Sakura! Where are you going?" Tomoyo had to jog to keep up because Sakura was walking very fast._

"_It's my fault. If only it was me who died, and not onee-san..."_

"_Don't say that!" They were by the river by then. "It's not your fault, she was sick, she'd never -"_

"_You don't understand!" Sakura stopped walking and spun around to face Tomoyo. "I wasn't there for her! For years she had been sick and not once did I help her, or console her, or do what a good daughter should do when their mothers are sick! I didn't even visit her in the hospital! I only went inside the room once, and you know what happened? SHE comforted ME. How could she?"_

_With tears streaming down her face, she ran opposite to the way to her house. Tomoyo didn't go after her this time._

_Sakura reached the old temple with a big cherry blossom tree in the middle just as the sky began to clear. She was wet, cold, and exhausted, but her mind was on a roll. What was wrong with her? She knew very well it wasn't her fault her mother died. But...oddly enough, the guilt was eating her up inside. She can't even look at her father and brother in the eye. Why was she guilty? Why should she be guilty? But... She can't explain it, but she has done something wrong. And now she has to pay for it._

_The scene then turned black, and a fifteen-year-old Sakura was standing in the middle of nothing._

"_Where am I...?"_

_Suddenly, a white light shone in front of Sakura. Sakura blinked. There was a figure that was walking, no, floating towards her. She couldn't make out the face, only the long flowing locks of hair and long dress billowing in the nonexistent wind. And then..._

"_Okaa-san?"_

_Sakura couldn't breathe. There was Nadeshiko, with her purple-grey hair, twinkling eyes, warm smile, and favorite white dress, right in front of her._

"_Sakura-chan."_

_Though her voice sounded the same warm, mezzo-soprano voice Sakura knew, it was echoing, like she was far away rather than 5 feet in front of her._

"_My Sakura, how you've grown."_

"_Is...Is it really you, nee-san?" Her voice trembled. Wow, it has been a long time since her voice sounded like that, and it was actually quite refreshing._

"_Of course. Don't tell me you have forgotten how I look like?" Nadeshiko chuckled._

"_No! Of course I'd never forget!"_

"_But you forgot your promise."_

_A promise? Sakura racked her brain for whatever her mother was talking about...but she came up with nada._

_Nadeshiko smiled again, but this time it didn't quite reach her eyes._

"_You promised me that you would grow up to be the same Sakura I once knew and loved. You promised to never forget who you truly are."_

_Then it hit her. It was the first and last time she went inside her mother's hospital room. After the crying, she stayed at her mother's cold yet soft arms. And just as she was drifting off to sleep, her mother made her promise something. She couldn't remember the exact words, but she remembered that she agreed to it before falling asleep._

"_...Oh."_

"_What happened, Sakura dear? Why did you detach yourself from...you? From your friends. From...your father and brother."_

_Sakura didn't answer. She didn't want to tell her mother about the guilt, the pain, the suffering...the confusion. After all, she was feeling that because of her mother's death. Nadeshiko, however, seemed to read her mind._

"_It's not your fault, nor your father's, nor anyone else's, for that matter. I was sick. It was my time. Please, Sakura, understand."_

_But how could she? Seven years has she hidden away her emotions, detaching herself from any human emotional need. Seven years has she constructed that thought, that knowledge, that by doing so will be enough of a penance. That by doing so, the guilt, the pain, the suffering and the confusion will all go away. Even though after seven years it still hasn't._

"_It's not too late," Nadeshiko said. "You are still young. It's not too late to go back. It is necessary for all the endeavors you are about to partake. But, please, you don't have to do this alone. Let your friends help. Let Fujitaka and Touya in. Please, my dear daughter. I don't want to see you lose yourself over something that doesn't even have anything to do with you."_

_Nadeshiko started to fade away._

"_Wait, onee-san!"_

"_Remember who you truly are, Sakura."_

And Sakura jerked awake.

**-TBC-**

**A/N: **Whew. Well, that certainly took me long enough. LOL. It's a more serious chapter, so I'm sorry. And half the time I didn't understand what I was typing... Er. Anyway. I hope you enjoyed it.

And, with that, I guess it's safe to say that I am SO back!

**EDIT:** OMG I totally didn't realize that I typed "onee-san" instead of "okaa-san"... That's what you get for writing chapters at 2 in the morning. Thank you reviewer for pointing it out to me! *mwah*


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